Ex-Gay Watch

Our team of intrepid Ex-Gay Watch reporters is scrambling to dig up more dirt on the crystal-clear link between the newly unveiled Google Plus (Circles) and the hideously anti-gay National Organization for Marriage, an association only made more obvious by the eerie similarities between their logos:

The Advocate is a well-known magazine that caters to the Queer community. It runs serious articles that inform readers of issues facing gays, and lighter fair for when you’ve read enough about Uganda’s legislative genocide for one day. One such piece is entitled “The Advocate’s 15 ‘Gayest’ Cities.” Randy Thomas, who is no longer “gay-identified” but for some reason still reads this prominent gay publication, has taken issue with the piece. Mike Albo, billed in the piece as an “intrepid amateur sociologist,” gives us his findings, with certain points emphasized by Randy Thomas:

Intrepid amateur sociologist Mike Albo searches for America’s 15 gayest burgs—based on a finely tuned (if totally arbitrary) calculus.

Long ago, gay people settled in our nation’s largest cities. There they spruced up all the property, created every art and fashion movement, and taught entire populations how to dance. They created gayborhoods like WeHo, Chelsea, South Beach—and pretty much queered all of San Francisco until even Laundromats had rainbow flag decals in their windows. About 10 years ago everyone else moved back into these nicely gentrified metropolises, and the lavender diaspora began. Now a slew of secondary cities are becoming gay epicenters.

This admittedly subjective search reveals spots that are much more pink than you might think. Determined by a completely unscientific but accurate statistical equation, these gayest cities may surprise you.

Of course, these are obviously cultural stereotypes, and Randy objects.

I hate math but it doesn’t take a mathematician to see that this “arbitrary calculus” has some highly questionable variables.

Is the criteria above for such a “lavender diaspora” truly what The Advocate thinks being a gay epicenter is about?  By the criteria above it appears they are saying that being gay is about political power/redefining marriage, gay activist data contextualizing the census, anonymous sex/online dating, gay bar culture and people who like to watch Brokeback Mountain or Birdcage.

You’d think that far right political activists wrote this article as a cultural meme to reinforce simplistic, and a couple of campy, stereotypes.

Mr. Albo includes zero criterion about gay centered or pro-gay churches/religious centers, no gay support groups, no attempt to study attitudes of the not gay neighbors … what about people who are in homosexual relationships but don’t identify as gay? … or with gay culture?

And lest anyone think he was reading The Advocate for anything other than investigative reporting:

Not that I affirm any of that or would presume to know what makes a “gayborhood … lavender diaspora.”

Apparently Randy’s obsession with being able to declare himself “free” of anything that might label him “gay” (or “gay-identified,” to put it in his terms) has limited his ability to understand satire. This article is a clear example of defensive humor, in which a cultural or ethnic minority forms a joke based on stereotypes used against them in order to diminish the stereotypes’ power. This is commonly seen in Jewish humor, among others. But no joke is too silly to be over-analyzed.

Plus, what good does it do to try and quantify the “gayest” cities? Regardless of the answer to that and even with the obvious satire the article could have been more thoughtful in trying to make its case.

Granted, Mr. Albo does say it is subjective and not scientific.  He obviously meant to deliver this article with a sense of humor.  He seriously doesn’t think the only creative dancing people in the world identify as gay … right?

The resulting list makes for an odd mix of cities that brings serious doubt about the accuracy of the results being truly reflective of the title of the article.  It also makes the purpose of publishing such an article suspect.

It “makes the purpose of publishing such an article suspect?” I suspect that the purpose of publishing the article was to make the predominantly gay readers of the magazine chuckle.

So, Randy Thomas and indeed all of Exodus can relax. Gays are no less committed to finding pro-gay places of worship, getting to know their gay neighbors, and entering into long-term loving relationships.

Carrie Prejean, who is Miss California, created a stir when she expressed support for marriage only being between a man and a woman at the Miss USA pageant. The National Organization for Marriage quickly adopted her as a spokesperson in their new ad, called “No Offense.” While they chose to focus on Carrie’s opinions about marriage, I chose to focus on her other exploits in this parody of the original that I created.

Note: I ask for donations at the website specified in the ad, but with tongue in cheek. In reality, any donations made would go towards support of the artist who produced all of this (me) and not to any actual organization or charity.

The video might be considered a bit racy for some, but it’s all in jest. If NOM should happen to take issue with it, well, let me just state for the record – “no offense.”

Update: I found a copy of NOM’s original ad on YouTube.

In a formal statement, Exodus has confirmed that after 23 years in the US, the organization will be going ex-American.

Speaking from Exodus’s Florida base yesterday, President Alan Chambers said emphatically that “we are no longer in the US.”

Let’s not play the political correctness card here. We’re not saying Americans are bad. The sin is not in being American or British or Chinese or any of these things. They’re all equally an abominable stench in the nostrils of God. The sin is in identifying with anything other than Christ.

“Change is a process,” Mr Chambers told reporters when asked why Exodus continued to operate out of the United States.

Vice President Randy Thomas elaborated: “I’m not an American. I’m a Christian who happens to have some US-related nationality issues.”

“I’m living proof that change is possible,” Randy continued, in the lilting drawl that fans have come to love.

There’s no such thing as American. I don’t have to identify with an American worldview. I don’t care what my passport says. Jesus says different. And who are you to tell me otherwise? I have a right to my opinion. The Constitution says so.

“And hallelujah to that,” interrupted Mr Chambers. He went on:

If I was asked to sum up succinctly what we’re saying here, I would say this: We are not and will not be what we were and thought we were then when we might and will yet be what we may have thought we would be now.

The group says it has no plans to relocate, citing the handiness of Disney World, Walmart and Dunkin’ Donuts as reasons for remaining in their current premises.

Meanwhile, Reverend Peter Ould of the UK has announced that he is “post-English,” though he admits he still struggles with thoughts of tea and scones “during low periods.”

Caleb Lee Brundidge and Richard Cohen brought to us through Planet Narth.  The scary part is that in the unedited video, the woman there is actually talking about going to funeral homes to try to raise the dead as a way to “spice up your ministry.”

YouTuber “Planet Narth” gives us a light-hearted vocabulary lesson with the help of Joseph Nicolosi. XGW covered the incident featured in the video, for those who are curious about it.

From GraphJam. H/T Wil Wheaton.

XGW has covered the strange story of David Pickup from several angles, but perhaps none so bizarre as this parody from our friends on Planet Narth.  Apparently the sky is rather pink there.

The Anglican Archbishop of Sydney, Dr. Peter Jensen, is a central figure in the opposition to same-sex marriages and homosexuals serving in the church. As such, he is also firmly against the appointment of openly gay Gene Robinson as the Bishop of New Hampshire. Earlier this year he attempted to rally support against homosexuality in a rift that threatens to split the church.

Curiously, Dr. Jensen is also consistent in rejecting the appointment of female bishops.

Archbishop Jensen has also argued strongly against the possibility of women bishops for the Anglican Church of Australia.

Holder of the Licentiate in Theology and Bachelor of Divinity, Dr. Jensen failed to answer direct questions regarding several passages of scripture that (most would agree) no longer apply in today’s culture and compare those to similar passages about homosexuality.  The interview, conducted by CNNNN, demonstrates at what point Dr. Jensen becomes rather less consistent.

He should, however, be credited for not quite entering the Nicolosi “Grey Zone” with his response.

A clever message that makes a good point.