Ex-Gay Watch

The Associated Baptist Press reports that both those who favor and those who doubt reorientation effectivity are skeptical about Ted Haggard’s newfound heterosexuality. On the pro side, Randy Thomas echoed Alan Chambers’ word on CNN.

“To be honest, I’m not aware of the specifics of what Mr. Haggard went through. But in my own personal experience that’s not the case — and in the experience of everyone I’ve talked to,” said Randy Thomas, vice president of the Florida-based group Exodus International.

Psychologist Lee Beckstead* provided an explanation for Haggard’s position.

Beckstead, like the majority of mental-health professionals, believes much of “ex-gay” therapy is psychologically harmful for people with homosexual orientations. However, he has done extensive research into the effects of sexual-reorientation therapy on people who have strong religious motivations for avoiding homosexual contact. Beckstead has argued among his peers for a more nuanced understanding of the psyches of such people before dismissing all aspects of “ex-gay” therapy.

People with religiously based antipathy toward homosexuality “need to see themselves as heterosexual, and their communities need to see them as heterosexual,” he said. “And so that kind of pressure kind of distorts the facts and distorts the information they present to other people.”

This need to be perceived both by oneself and one’s community as heterosexual could help us all understand some of the contraditory statements that seem the calling card of ex-gay leaders.

Thomas seemed to agree with Beckstead to some extent.

Exodus’s Thomas said that Haggard’s worldview may prevent him from confronting a sexual attraction to men head-on.

“There’s a lot of people who deal with same-sex attraction who never identified as gay, who would never adopt that worldview. That might be the perspective he’s coming from [but] I’m not positive,” he said.

* UPDATE

Although the Associated Baptist Press presents Lee Beckstead as having a “differing opinion” on sexual-reorientation therapy, it should be understood that Beckstead is a defender of some change therapy (under certain circumstances) and is a referred and presents himself as a source for from the LDS Church (the Mormons).

Beckstead has done some research and his conclusions are that while orientation (attraction) did not change in any of his study participants, some did report positive responses including reconciling self-identity, control of behaviors, and less intensity of same-sex attraction. He also reported that harm can result from the traditional forms or reorientation therapy (ie false expectations, internalized failures, and demonization of gays and lesbians).

Much of Beckstead’s thinking appears to me to be similar to the values-based counseling currently being discussed by Dr. Warren Throckmorton. We may discuss Beckstead further in that context.

PageOneQ has the response of Mike Jones, the escort who exposed mega-church pastor Ted Haggard’s same-sex philandering.

Jones responds to two claims made by Rev. Tim Ralph, a member of Haggard’s restoration team.

Ralph claimed, “He is completely heterosexual. It was the acting-out situations where things took place. It wasn’t a constant thing.”

In response to one of Haggard’s counselor’s claims that Haggard’s activities were not a “constant thing,” Jones explained that he could only speak to the time he spent with Haggard and that had an ongoing sexual relationship with the minister and that their time together “indicated a gay man to me.”

Ralph also claimed that Jones was Haggard’s sole male contact. “If we’re going to be proved wrong, somebody else is going to come forward, and that usually happens really quickly,” he said. “We’re into this thing over 90 days and it hasn’t happened.”

Jones also shared that he had heard from two other individuals that claimed they had encounters with Haggard. Those accusers, Jones asserted, have chosen to remain anonymous for fear of losing their jobs.

I missed Tuesday’s episode of Boston Legal about a man suing to recover moneys spent in failed reorientation efforts. But AfterElton has comments here

…in the episode, a judge (Henry Gibson, he of Laugh-In fame) secures the assistance of the firm in order to sue a “faith-based treatment center” that promised to cure him of his same-sex yearnings (his doctor diagnoses his gayness as “Same Sex Attraction Disorder”, or SSAD), and failed (to the tune of 40,000).

UPDATE

A youtube clip of the episode is available here

(hat tip to Scott H)

Newsweek interviewed actor Chad Allen about Save Me, his movie about one gay man’s experience with an ex-gay ministry.

Your character in “Save Me” struggles to reconcile his Christian beliefs with his homosexual desires. Which parts of that struggle ring true to you?

Pretty much all of it. It wasn’t like I set out to tell my story, but where the script ended up is a struggle that I relate to almost in its entirety. My character starts out finding himself loveless and godless. I went through that. There was a time in life when I was absolutely desperate and addicted and void of love. My character’s entire process of finding God and finding love, while truncated, is truthful for me. That’s what it looked like, except mine was over the course of six and a half years, not two hours.

Did you ever enter a gay reparative-therapy program, as your character does?

No, thankfully. I say thankfully because I think for me it would have been a very damaging experience, as I think it often is for people. We presented a very loving, very middle-of-the-road ex-gay ministry. But there are many that we’ve looked at that are much more extreme, and potentially much more damaging to the psyche.

Considering the favorable press this movie has received, some of it from conservative Christian sources, I expect that it will find a distributor soon.

From the Orlando Sentinel:

Alan Chambers will discuss “the topic of change in homosexuality, faith and the ex-gay movement.” Cooper’s program airs at 10 on CNN.

One topic: The suggestion that the Rev. Ted Haggard, former president of the National Association of Evangelicals, is “completely heterosexual” after attending an Exodus program.

That’s the first I’ve heard that Haggard attended an Exodus program. 

Geico, an insurance company, has an advertising campaign that is not only memorable but tells an important message. The tag line is “Geico.com. So easy even a caveman can do it”.Several commercials follow the efforts of cavemen to educate and enlighten the ad executives as to the offensive nature of the ads. The execs refuse to see it as offensive, become condescending, and make apologies that are clearly of the “go away now” variety.

Read more…

Charles Alexander at Between the Lines brings us news of an organzation that can help your pet fight its unwanted same-sex attraction.

Think your own Christian pet might be gay? Don’t panic. It’s just a phase.

For a chuckle you might check it out.
Warning. Article involves mockery.

As we previously discussed, Conservative Jewish synagogues may now decide to accept gay rabbis and officiate at same-sex blessings if they so choose. As reported in JTA, the Chancellor of the Jewish Theological Seminary commissioned a survey to see how Conservatives were feeling about the new rules.

Roughly two-thirds of Conservative rabbis and cantors said in the survey released Wednesday that the Jewish Theological Seminary should admit openly gay and lesbian students for rabbinical study.

Percentages in favor were even higher among the movement’s professional and lay leadership.

Similar margins of support were found for the idea of Conservative rabbis officiating at same-sex commitment ceremonies.

While the survey was an internet poll and thus not overly reliable, the high percentage of lay leaders and clergy suggest that it may reflect actual attitudes.

The San Jose Mercury News tells us of the intense pressures put on young gay Chinese

Like many gay men in China, 22-year-old Chen Lei enjoys the newfound liberties of urban life. But he says he cannot fight his destiny: to marry a woman for whom he feels no attraction.For economic, social and cultural reasons, the pressure on gays in China to wed and raise families is high.

In Chen’s case, his family hails from a village in Inner Mongolia, and he dares not tell them of his private life in the big city, knowing they would not understand.

Some might be tempted to think that these Chinese men are making the decision to marry because the values that they hold most important include marriage and a family rather than a life consistent with their orientation. However, I would caution from making such an assumption.

This has led to a spate of loveless — and often short — marriages designed to placate the family and procure progeny.”Many gays hurry to marry, then hurry to divorce,” said Xiao Dong, the head of a volunteer civic group in Beijing’s Chaoyang district that battles AIDS.

In our conversations about living consistently with one’s values, we must consider whether faith values have been placed on young people from external cultural or familial forces that with maturity and time will become less persuasive. Western counselors that may encourage efforts of same-sex attracted persons to pursue heterosexuality or marriage because these are values expressed by the client need to keep in mind that the consequences of such direction in the long term may leave both the patient and many others in pain.

Some stories need to be told. One such story is the short life of Anthony Castro. As first reported by Outsports, Castro’s courage and determination was tragically cut short by an auto accident on January 21. Yet his impact on his community and the perceptions others may have will live on.

From an ESPN article:

A four-year starter for the Banning High Broncos when the team’s starting quarterback was ruled academically ineligible, Anthony, a 6-foot, 210-pound fullback, volunteered to take his place. He had never played the position before, but that didn’t stop the Broncos’ captain from making all-conference.

Anthony was also captain of the swim team, a member of the wrestling squad and part of the yearbook staff. Despite his being the big man on campus, freshmen felt comfortable enough around him to ask for help if they were being bullied by other upperclassmen. Teachers loved him, and the girls adored him. In six years, there had been only one graduation party principal Jim Broncatello stayed at until the end. It was Anthony’s.

This may not appear special until you know that Anthony was openly gay in a conservative school in a redneck town whose mother kicked him out when she found out he was gay. Anthony rose above his challenges and gained the respect of those who knew him.

We salute him.

(photo courtesy www.outsports.com)