Many people, even those involved in countering the ex-gay movement, have probably never heard of JONAH (Jews Offering New Alternatives to Homosexuality). In a field that is dominated by Evangelical Christianity, JONAH seems to stand alone as the only ex-gay group targeted specifically at Jews.
First, I feel I should explain a little bit about Judaism and homosexuality:
- There are 4 main “flavors” of Judaism, which I list here from most liberal to most conservative: Reconstructionist, Reform, Conservative, and Orthodox (which also includes what are known as Chasidic communities).
- Reconstructionist and Reform Judaism fully accept GLBT members and ordained rabbis. Conservative Judaism came to a compromise solution: Homosexuality is both accepted and rejected; it is up to the individual synagogue to decide. GLBT Rabbis are ordained. Orthodox and Chasidic communities outright reject homosexuality.
- The Torah (first five books of the Jewish Bible, the “law” or the teachings of Moses) does not define any form of sexuality as an identity. Homosexual acts are condemned- not the homosexual identity.
In what I call our own version of “love the sinner, hate the sin,” Jews who oppose homosexuality insist that God does not condemn the homosexual orientation, only homosexual acts. This means, of course, that in their eyes there are two options for gay Jews: be celibate, or go straight- achieving the latter possibly with JONAH’s help.
But JONAH’s credentials seem less than reassuring. At a time when it seems nearly all ex-gay groups are purging their websites of any mention of ex-gay, ex-Moonie, and ex-licensed reparative therapist Richard Cohen, JONAH refuses to jump ship. Cohen has his own page in their online library, featuring three of his articles. In JONAH’s page for suggested questions for a Prospective Therapist or Counselor, six questions from Cohen’s book “Coming Out Straight” are prominently presented.
Oh, and by the way, Cohen is also an ex-Jew.
Because JONAH is a minority as a Jewish ex-gay organization and not a Christian one, it has become very close to the “secular” ex-gay think-tank NARTH. Pseudo-science from NARTH’s own library is what fills out JONAH’s. One example is an interview of Jungian Psychotherapist and ex-lesbian Diane Eller-Boyko, R.N., L.C.S.W. by Dr. Joseph Nicolosi. Nicolosi says his male clients want to connect and bond,
“But they want to have that bonding in a more exciting, physical kind of way. The masculine approach is more like, ‘We’re going to go climb a mountain and wrestle together.’”
Eller-Boyko responds,
“…some of the women I know– writers, movie makers–are finding this connection through the women’s movement. There is something there that is offering them richness. If we’re going to work with women, we have to understand why they’re so pulled to this movement, instead of pooh-poohing it as being nothing more than a group of man-haters.”
So apparently when you climb aboard with JONAH, you subscribe not only to the outdated theories about gender identity touted as “science” by ex-gay groups – you find yourself on the opposing side of Feminism. (And, in an aside, I think that Nicolosi should use caution when one of his struggling gay clients tells him that he’s going to bond with other men in an “exciting, physical way” by deciding to go “wrestle together.”)
I also want to note that even with its associations with “secular” NARTH, JONAH seems to be lacking in research and documentation conducted by Jewish doctors and scientists. Even the Jewish authors in the online library quote extensively from research conducted by Evangelical Christian colleagues. Upon reading featured therapist Janelle Hallman’s article, you would never know she is a devout Christian. However, a link to her personal website is provided, and upon arrival you are immediately greeted with the tagline “A private practice in Christian counseling, pastoral ministry, public speaking, resources, and education.” Even roundly discredited Evangelical Christian propagandist Dr. Paul Cameron is cited, as I mentioned in a previous article.
Jews who come to JONAH in the hopes of finding a purely Jewish response to homosexuality will no doubt be met with some disappointment.
“We’re going to go climb a mountain and wrestle together”
I think I saw that movie. It had sheep in it.
And how does one “ex-Jew” themself? Perhaps you mean “Jewish, but non-practising. He currently worships in a Christian church.”
Gawd, why does that sort of wording sound so… ex-gay familiar…
Um… by converting. It’s pretty easy.
Well, yes… and sorry if I was being obscure — I’m actually raising the old chestnut about Jewish-ness being “a people” or “a religion”.
As in… is it what you are or what you do?
(true story: “But you’re still a Jew. It doesn’t change anything, you’re always a Jew” — said by a mate’s grandmother after he went all buddhist on us. She was a riot, rest her soul.)
Well, it’s true, you’re still a Jew by culture and heritage even if you convert. This is a truth about our people that even the Nazis realized: Edith Stein, the nun who had converted from Judaism to Catholicism, was put in the death camps as a Jew. And the Jewish people have some distinctive genetic characteristics, including risk of getting Tay Sachs disease. I believe this is for Eastern European Jews but I’m not certain. Even Biblically, the Jewish people are traced back to the 12 tribes, the Israelites.
I think a parallel can definitely be made to the ex-gay movement. People who claim to be ex-gay really are still gay even though they’ve stopped being “observant” gays.
But as with ANY point of debate for Jews, people will come out and say the exact opposite of what I’ve said: “you’re not Jewish if you converted! PERIOD!” so my goal is definitely NOT to start a debate with those people.
Hi Emily!
Yes, parallels can be made with all kinds of conversions.But it’s the motive and method that matter most of all.
The ex gay industry make it sound very benevolent and beneficial and inclusive.
I remember my young Russian/Jewish immigrant friend who said he hated being a Jew. He broke my heart when he said it.
But considering where he came from and was raised, I wasn’t surprised he’d hate being a Jew.
THAT’S the motive and method of the ex gay industry.
Gay folks sure don’t hate being gay on their own.
If you don’t hate yourself enough, they’ll work hard to make sure you do and that they get lots of help as well.
Sounds like clients of JONAH will not become ex-gay – but they may end up as ex-Jews. To me, as a Jew, it always seemed like an Evangelical front for conversion.
Regan:
You are spot on regarding all points you made.
Wayne:
I remember reading those exact statements in your book “Anything but Straight.” I think if they’re careful to stick to the Rabbinical commentary etc., they’ll get ex-gays and not ex-Jews – but it’s a thin barrier they place up. The very reason I bought your book was because I learned of several conservative movements of Judaism whose policy on gays involved reparative therapy. I love the book but I wish that you’d gone into more detail or had done more research on the Jewish side of the ex-gay movement, especially since you yourself are a Jew.